The Manner/Manor To Which We Become Accustomed

When I was little, (I'm not especially tall now), I aspired to being a good wife to the husband my parents would find me, become independent of them, have a really lovely house, and around five children. It was the typical dream for Indian females of my era. I believe, for many it still is their future, even those achieving excellence in academia.

Arriving in England, having no extended family, even though I wasn't cognisant of it, my mindset was changing. Starting infant school I was fortunate to be 'adopted' by a couple of older girls who lived a few hundred yards from me. As I learned English, I read. The more I read, the more I knew I wasn't like the other Asian children.

Anyway, I grew up. I married. I disappointed my parents. And got on with my very strange life; a mix of British and Asian. English is my first language and Punjabi my second. With my feet firmly planted in two cultures, I feel very privileged.

My last house was big, with an even bigger garden. The house that I've moved into a few months ago is less than half its size. I haven't been able to call it home; not yet.

There's a lot of work going on here. Some I can do myself and have been doing, but the larger projects are paid for others to do. The bathroom is very oddly shaped. Tiny too.  It had to be plastered and tiled and a new suite put in. Had my dad still been alive, it would have been fun trying to do it with his help.

However I did peel off wallpaper and ceiling stuff and used a hammer and chisel thingy to get the cupboard that used to house the immersion tank, out.

Hopefully by Saturday, the roof will be on the extension and the rain not washing the floor tiles, and then by the end of next week...

The very important thing is that I like the workmen that are doing the work. I know I'm qualified as a communicator but I'm also very easy to get on with. But just like life, love and friendships, it is a two-way street.

I'm going to be happy when the work is over and the guys are all gone, however, when the work is done and the house finished, I'm going to miss them all.